2011年4月13日 星期三
Describing a person
I hope someone can help me find my cousin who comes from America. It’s because she will arrive Tainan airport today for summer vacation. Thus, I’m afraid that she will get lost for not familiar with the new place. And below are some details about her and I hope it is helpful. First, my cousin’s name is Annie who is a junior high school student. Second, she has a long and blonde hair. Beside, she wears contact lenses whose color is brown. Third, she looks quite slim and tall. I think she’s over 165 cm. Finally, she wears pink dress today. I hope these detail will help you a lots. And if you find out her, please contact me as soon as possible. My phone number is 0912345678. THANKS A LOTS! Xuan.
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敘述的英文可以換成別的會比較好喔
回覆刪除she wears contact lenses whose color is brown
這句關帶應該要用which吧??
I hope these detail will help you a lots.
這句語意怪怪的.help you後面可以家個to find her或是recognize her之類的 還有detail要加s喔喔
倒數第三行和最後一行 應該是 a lot吧...
回覆刪除就這兩個地方 XD
前面的劇情可改為本來他要來~
回覆刪除卻沒有出現!!!而且聯絡不到人~~~這樣比較好=)
And below are some details about her and I hope it is helpful. 句首用and好像不太好!!!
再加上一點警張氣紛會更好喔!!!
開頭敘述與眾不同很棒欸~~!
回覆刪除details 可以改為characters比較好~
these detail 沒加s唷~
不過到最後怪怪欸,你不去接她而是要別人找到他在連絡你@@?!! 可以說你在機長找不到她或連絡不到她,所以需要大家找她? 恩.ˇ.
*你的文章很順暢轉折、連接詞也很多很豐富很精采唷!
And below are some details about her and I hope it is helpful.
回覆刪除below不是名詞耶..And the descriptions below~
Beside, she wears contact lenses whose color is brown. whose適用在人吧
不過~為什麼不自己去接他而是用尋人的方式~
好像不太對耶
作者已經移除這則留言。
回覆刪除arrive Tainan airport
回覆刪除arrive 是vi.吧 :D// arrive at Tainan airport
for not familiar with the new place
我不知道可不可以沒有be欸
因為不是be familiar with?
//for unfamiliarity with the new place
And below are some details
// And the descriptions below ~
contact lenses whose color is brown
角膜變色片 cosmetic lens或color lens
//which color
描述很詳盡喔!
但是他只是要來台灣而已怎麼需要尋人啟示呢?
我覺得你尋人啟示的It’s because she will arrive Tainan airport today for summer vacation怪怪的耶~不能直接打手機連絡就好嗎?
回覆刪除I think she’s over 165 cm.我覺得I think可以不用耶~畢竟是尋人啟示~肯定一點的語氣比較好吧~=ˇ=
我覺得整篇文章還滿通順的喔~^^
最後一行應該是 a lot 吧
回覆刪除整篇文章都漫通順的喔
前面的部分可以再加一句,
回覆刪除因為到了機場沒找到人,
不然有點怪怪的!
and
THANKS A LOT!
感覺描述的很仔細,
也很通順!