2011年4月27日 星期三
Comparing-2
When it comes to the important person in America Revolution, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson are included. They’re similar to each other in many ways. First, both them were delegates to the Continental Congress. Moreover, they were singers of Declaration of Independence. Second, John studied and practiced law, and Thomas was no exception. Third, John’s and Thomas’s position were alike. Rather, both them were presidents of the United States. Finally, it’s a coincidence that they both died in July, 4, 1826. To sum up, according to above information we can know their spirit and devotion. No wonder they’re still respected by the public nowadays.
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真不錯!比較的地方~
回覆刪除使用了很多大家沒用的句式~
條列的也很清楚!
前後的句子也有到位!
棒=)
噢噢噢 你是我目前看到寫的最棒的:">
回覆刪除這篇寫的真的很暫耶
超順的!
讚:">
回覆刪除When it comes to the important person in America Revolution, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson are included. They’re similar to each other in many ways.
回覆刪除-->persons
我喜歡這開頭~~
and Thomas was no exception. 哇~還有這種寫法耶!!
died in July, 4, 1826.-->on
寫得真好
寫的很好耶~
回覆刪除沒有文章內容的問題~
開頭也很棒喔~When it comes to the important person in America Revolution, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson are included=>good!!1
努力像你學習=ˇ=
寫的很好耶
回覆刪除沒有什麼太大的問題:>
開頭超讚的我喜歡 :>>>>
沒什麼問題,整篇文章寫的好棒欸~
回覆刪除開頭跟結尾都與眾不同,我都好喜歡!
尤其是你還用到講義以外的句法(Second, John studied and practiced law, and Thomas was no exception. 好讚!!)
再加上轉折詞當配的不冗贅很順暢,這是我最想學習的地方!! 好厲害。ˇ。
開頭跟結論句都超強的!!
回覆刪除Thomas was no exception
→讚!!
要向你多多學習~
>~<
they were singers // signers XDD
回覆刪除Second, John studied and practiced law, and Thomas was no exception.
後面那句如果改成別的寫法, 1+1的感覺會讓我覺得更有肯定的意味: )
died in July, 4, 1826// died on July, 4, 1826
喜歡你的結語呢!
寫得真棒!
both...這個句型有重複到
回覆刪除可以改成其他的句型 像likewise 或 similarly...
其他的寫得不錯阿 如果把重複的部分改掉會更好XDD